Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Do You Need To Be Taught How To Parent?


 "Training Definition Magnifier" by Stuart Miles via freedigitalphotos.net


Or at least they think 4 out of 10 parents there should be educated on this topic to ensure better children and eventual adult citizens in their communities.

How would you feel if you were required to take parenting classes? 

I'd support it. I'm a self help junkie.

But what if you felt you'd had enough experience in life to parent a child?

What if you worked in the world of childhood psychology, education and care?

Aren't you qualified then?

What if you were brought up by healthy parents, who proved themselves to be void of any major disfunction and you felt quite capable of bringing a healthy individual into the world; raising them to become an upstanding citizen in society?

Do you still need training?

I wouldn't mind it- honestly, we don't know everything. We can't.

Textbooks and degrees don't teach you how to cope with certain real life circumstances, they can't help you with unmatched temperaments, past hurts or commonsense approaches to issues at home with your own kids while you're under pressure. They can't. Ask any surgeon or law enforcement agent (just to start) and they'll tell you that when you're in the situation, it takes more.

Why doesn't just education help? Because you're mind is already too submersed in the details, plus your too close to the problem which can most often result in actually mishandling things. It takes learning from others, sometimes hearing how they handled something, how they even made mistakes and what they'd do if they had a second chance.

I would, however, wonder who would tell teach me. 

What would their track record look like?

Would they be similar to our general boards across the world: often knowing little about being in the trenches  but more than happy to be paid and respected for telling others what to do?
 (Harsh, maybe, but remember, included in our initial choice to homeschool was this.)

Or would they be fellow parents?

I wouldn't ever have ever been able to picture (in my early years) that I could have kids like mine. Coming from a broken home at 7 1/2, divorced parents- one removed, other factors both in the family and within myself that have ruined several days of my life growing up, lack of traditions, family ties, then two divorces of my own...

Certainly seems like that would all spell 'D.E.S.T.I.N.E.D. T.O. F.A.I.L.' right?

But so far that's not happening. We are closer than anyone else in my family.
I can only think of very few others who are similar in this way. We're doing something right without Mom having an ideal upbringing.

The first thing I think might be working? I don't ever think I know it all (at home or in my head).

I have WISHED (OK, BEGGED!) for years that our nation would require us to be educated before we take babies home (and not just on breastfeeding, removing an umbilical cord and diaper changing).

We often don't know what we're doing (or what we're doing wrong) until we actually do it.
So, what's the harm in learning more (as long as it's from those who've gone through it already and have proven success--hmm sounds a lot like current day parents seeking books, Twitter and blog posts doesn't it?) I just wish more parents would…I applaud you for being one of the brave who aren't afraid to learn more.

The book I wrote (oh, yes, it's still sitting here, like many author's books that aren't finished yet or was written three times and they just keep adding more) is dubbed to be my idea of 'The Manual'. Yes, that manual which we did not get on the way out of the hospital with our newborn.

Honestly, I'm not sure that any parent is perfect.
Truth, perfection is an illusion. (If you know me, you are laughing…out loud.)

The real and best truth?
We can all stand to improve (anything), because we are a constant work in progress and haven't arrived. And it's ok.

Read the article and vote. Do you think that parents would get better with training? Do you think you need it? Do you feel that because you deal with children all day long as a care giver, have a degree or training in a career which involves children (education, psychology or pediatrics) you shouldn't have to be 'educated' on how to bring up baby?

Parenting isn't easy. There is no manual, formula, or education other than experience (and learning from others).

What would the harm be in wanting better parents? 

It's not something that should be taken personally.

BECAUSE IN THE END, IT'S NOT ABOUT US AT ALL… IT'S ABOUT THE KIDS. <3





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