Monday, November 17, 2014

Could Dating Too Young Cause School Shootings?

"Cute Couple With Broken Heart" by nipitphand via freedigitalphotos.ne


Here's a scene we're all (sadly) too familiar with:

Boy meets girl in school.
Boy & girl 'date'. 
Girl shows signs of 'eh'.

They break up?

Boy is heartbroken...

Boy goes on a shooting rampage?


We usually see this broken heart domestic violence style behavior in the adult world, and it's sick then when it happens. Commonly, there's been violence or a troubled relationship from the start.

But, in  the recent Washington school shooting case it's possibly from a teenage broken heart.

While all of the information and proven motive (if they can even identify one) is not out yet, it was mentioned that they boy's social media pages proved his anguish...

The broken hearted boy even shot his relatives that went to his school…

Double Take Please:

The shooter was kind and well liked….
God was in the home…
Never any behavioral issues or problems in the past.
Kids on campus were even claiming that they were in total shock and disbelief once the shooter was identified… they couldn't imagine him over anyone else to be the one to do something so horrible.


My head is spinning-

Because it debunks one of my theories:
          Kids who have God in their life don't tend to be as violent as those who don't...

Because it confirms two of my other theories:
          Beefing up gun laws and background checks is baloney (put very nicely) and won't do diddly squat...

and...
                                       
         Dating for teens is a grave mistake

Call me crazy, but look at the situation… 
I'm not the expert, but I think we have to come at this from all angles. 

Here's a kid who was well liked, great home life, lots of friends, active in extracurriculars (okay guns was one of those- and could be left on the table for debate), but he was still a human being; a young one. His social media (and I'll be willing to bet that his texts and talk with friends too) prove him on a ledge of some sort just prior to the shootings.

Should we be educating ourselves and schools on warning signs?
Should we be talking about (and taking seriously) potential mental health issues in America, and amongst our adolescents especially?
Should we be reevaluating how we identify those who are 'at risk'?

Look at the pressures and freedoms we offer young kids and teens. Like getting into serious relationships before they are fully aware of themselves, their goals, futures or even how to behave, rationalize and move forward after a hardship or heartbreak? Have we considered their emotional maturity or ability to reason?

Sometimes I feel like we rush kids. First into school at Pre-K, then into too many extra-curriculars, later on pushing them to get jobs so they can make money and become responsible and on top of that they're expected to excel at school all at the same time. On occasion, some teens will wrap up all their happiness, positive focus, self-worth and even reason for living, into another person-or their own social persona.

….And when that boyfriend or girlfriend walks away, or someone unfriends them, what happens?

Their world comes tumbling down…

We have some work to do.

But where do we begin if we aren't even sure of the problem?











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